5 Things Intended Parents and their Gestational Surrogate Should Discuss Before the Birth
Preparing for the birth is super exciting! Surrogates and intended parents always have a beautiful vision of the moment the baby is born. Intended parents imagine that love at first sight feeling and surrogates imagine the euphoria of watching a family fall in love.
While many of the uber-important topics are discussed during the matching process such as, home birth versus hospital birth and natural delivery versus epidural, there are several smaller details that should be discussed that are just as important. So, here are 5 things to talk about before the big day that will ensure a beautiful experience for all.
1. Who will be in the room? Make sure to set a clear plan as to who is allowed in the delivery room to avoid anyone being uncomfortable. Will the surrogate want a support person of her own? Will the intended parents be asking for grandparents to be present? What will the hospital allow with Covid protocols in place? This conversation is especially important if you are having a planned C-section. Many hospitals have very strict criteria for who can be in the operating room.
2. What are those in the room are allowed to see? Discuss in advance if you are comfortable, as the surrogate, having intended fathers see what is happening below the waist.
3. Will pictures be allowed? Do you want pictures taken during the delivery? If so, what are you comfortable with being photographed?
4. Will the intended parent want to cut the cord? Or, in some cases, the delivery physician will let the intended parent “deliver” the baby.
5. Who will the baby be passed to upon delivery? Some surrogates will ask to have the baby passed to them, so they can then hand the beautiful gift to the intended parents herself.
Discussing these 5 things will help ensure a beautiful day for all!