Gay dads, Single dads...Not a Woman
Many times when people think of a typical person who might need to use surrogacy to grow their family, they think of two gay dads. Although this can be a true example of who uses a surrogate, there are so many other couples and even single parents who are not able to have babies on their own. The truth is, there is no typical person! A unique difference for same sex male couples and single dads is that as males, and not having a uterus, they are unable to carry a child, so they might have less idea how pregnancy is, and they definitely have not had to endure pregnancy hormones. They haven’t had to endure the experience of many pregnant women; hormonal emotions, such as crying at that Cheerios commercial of the family eating cereal around the table, something she might not have done if not pregnant. There are so many other crazy cravings and weird things that happen when a woman is pregnant that men just might not be able to understand as well.
So as a male, how can you they support a surrogate carrying a child or children for you? The answer is very simple. Just be there for anything they need. If she wants to dip her pickles in ice cream, let her! And don’t judge her for that. Half the time as a pregnant woman we don’t even know why we like theses crazy thing; we just do. Of course, if it is too crazy, or seems to be harmful, that would be a good time to ask questions and step in.
The next thing you can do is just support her. Support can be shown in so many ways. Simply asking what you can do to make something a little simpler in her life, such as, perhaps, ordering dinner to be delivered one night for her and her family could go a long way. The biggest support advice I can give, is to just be there with her. As surrogates, we want the same as you do. We want you to go home with a healthy child. This is not our child, and we always want to be making the best decisions for you and love input. If you are unable to make the appointments, due to time or distance, even a simple little text wishing her luck, letting her know you are there in spirit and asking how things went is great. Believe it or not, we also love seeing that healthy heartbeat every time and really want to share those moments with you.