Surrogacy and Different Types of Family Structures in the Gay Community
IVF and Gestational Surrogacy have made it possible for many different types of families to grow, especially within the LGBTQ community. When a gay couple or a gay single person (or even a straight single person!) decide to use a surrogate, there are 3 important things to consider.
Legal Considerations: The laws in the state in which the surrogate lives and who can be on the birth certificate. When considering using a Gestational Carrier, it is important to know the laws in the state in which the Carrier lives and will give birth. It is important to know if a Pre-Birth Order can be obtained and for what configuration of family. The Pre-Birth Order establishes which parents can be on the birth certificate. Colorado is surrogacy friendly and LGBTQ surrogacy friendly, so both parents, no matter the gender, can be listed on the birth certificate! Some states do not allow two individuals of the same sex to be on the birth certificate. Conversely, Colorado also allows for only one parent if a single parent wants to be the sole parent listed. If you are working with an agency, they should match you with a carrier that lives in an LGBTQ law friendly state. Please make sure that you consult an Assisted Reproductive Technology Attorney to know your parental rights in the state the baby will be born.
Biological Considerations: How do you decide who the biological parent will be? It’s possible to decide that neither partner will be the biological parent and use donated embryos or donated eggs and sperm. Two dads may use a mix of their sperm, leaving the genetics up to chance. They could also use the genetics of one parent for the first child and then use the genetics of the other parent for the second child…OR have two embryos, one related to each parent, transfer both embryos at the same time and hope for twins.
Embryo Transfer Considerations: How many embryos should we transfer? Your biological consideration could be part of this consideration. It is fairly common in the LGBTQ surrogacy community to want to transfer more than one embryo. Surrogacy is expensive, most surrogates only charge $5000 more for a multiple pregnancy, so doing it all at once can be appealing when it seems like you are getting a deal! But, twin pregnancies come with more risk for the babies with early birth and NICU or other, much higher, medical costs. There are risks also for the surrogate with a higher chance of bed rest (these expenses can add up quickly) and needing a C-section. Because of these higher risks, Reproductive Endocrinologists often recommend transferring only one embryo and not all Gestational Carriers are open to more than one embryo per transfer.
There is so much to consider when you are wanting to start or build your family through surrogacy. We would love to help you through this process! Please contact Colorado Surrogacy for a free consult or email us directly with any questions you have at info@coloradosurro.com.